Somewhere Only We Know

[Cortney Smit]

Cortney stood in front of her desk in the room she shared with Blythe, her blue eyes looking at the photo that lived on the shelf above the desk, blue eyes identical to her own looked out at her, only those blue eyes were on a girl five years younger than her seventeen years. She swallowed as she reached up and brushed her fingers against the silver frame. No matter how many years went past, today would never get any easier, wouldn't hurt any less than what it did right then.

Stepping away from the desk, she shed the cheer uniform she was wearing and slipped into a pair of jeans and shirt before she pulled her jacket on. She didn't feel in the mood to be cheerful, and the uniform just wasn't doing it for her right then. She knew that they would have a practice, it being Saturday and all, but she needed a little space right then. Scribbling a note that she was heading out to the trails - and offering no more information than that - she left the note on her room-mate's pillow, slipped her feet into her boots and headed for the door.

Walking straight past the barn, where her mare was possibly finishing off the haynet Cortney had given her with her breakfast, and continued down the path until she got to the Blue River Trails. Taking the easier of the two, she followed the river downstream, walking as close to the edge as she could safely get once she got to the river itself.

"I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?"

Her voice filled the air as she sang, the song resonating with the painful loss she felt, her lower lip trembled a little as she held onto the trunk of a tree as she looked into the river - not that she had any intention of jumping, she was sad, not suicidal - and the song went on as she moved on along the trail again.

"Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?

Oh simple thing where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go?
So why don't we go?

Ah-ah-ah
Ah-ah-ah

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know?
Somewhere only we know? "

[Katja Eder]

The weather was getting slightly less nice as Kentucky came into the fall, but it was nothing that Katja wasn't used to. Tucked into a light sweatshirt, she groomed Mukki, making sure that the gelding was staying healthy, then went and found his tack, setting about the task that was getting him ready to ride. However, this time, as she was only planning on a trail ride, she didn't change into anything, leaving her jeans as they were. The gelding loved arena work, at least she thought, but then, variety was never a bad thing in moderation.

After she had finished wrapping his legs in the bright turquoise wraps, she swapped his halter for the bridle, then grabbed her helmet and buckled it on. A small pack held all that she might need, and she didn't expect to be out too long in any case. After choosing the direction she would be starting in, she followed the sign posts along the trail. As they walked along, she kept some of her attention on Mukki's ears, knowing they would be the first sign of warning that the gelding was planning something, but looking around at the trail they followed otherwise.

As they approached the river properly, Mukki's ears pricked forward, and Katja looked up ahead, expecting to only see the river, but instead, she could see a girl, Cortney, from her Mounted Games class. As they approached behind her, Katja could begin to hear the girl's voice as it stopped being drowned out by the river. She appeared to be singing, a sad song, although Katja couldn't say that she knew it. As they drew closer, Katja considered her options, then spoke quietly, not wanting to disturb the other girl, but not sure how she would feel about being followed by a horse, "Behind you."

[Cortney Smit]

"Somewhere only we know?"She let the last word trail off in a whisper as she looked out over the river beside her as she walked along. She didn't know why, but being near a river always made her feel close to her sister. Her feelings would make sense if Myriam had been cremated and her ashes scattered over a body of flowing water, but no, Myr had been buried at the cemetery next to the grave of an aunt that neither girl had ever met... or at least an aunt that Cortney hadn't met.

She glanced over her shoulder as she heard a voice behind her and she felt her cheeks heat slightly. "Oh, sorry." She said as she stepped closer to the edge once again. "I didn't realise that I'd stepped onto the trail so much." If it had been any other trail, she would have just snapped at the other girl, whom she recognised from mounted games at the least, to move past them it not like she was going to bite the stupid horse. Though she didn't know if she could snap at anyone right then, not when that deep guilt still had a firm hold of her heart.

"Nice horse." She commented. Yes, she would rather be alone, but there was no point shunning herself if she didn't have to. "Hanoverian?

[Katja Eder]

Katja could feel some tension in the air as the other girl looked back at her, moving over, "That is fine. I did not want to startle you, is all." She had Mukki do a half-pass to the side further from the edge of the river, which the girl had freed up for them, and was about to ask him to move past when she heard the compliment to her mount. She had him slow once more, not wanting to draw away from the girl, although at the same time, she did want to, considering that she hadn't planned on bothering Cortney today, and the girl seemed introspective, in some manner.

She smiled down at the girl, "Thank you." She nodded, "Yes, he is." In German, he was a Hannoveraner, although it didn't really matter. Unlike some cities, Hannover didn't change its name too much, apart from losing an 'n'. "I could not hear what you were singing, but you have a wonderful voice." She hoped that it wasn't too intrusive, admitting that she had heard some of the girl's song, a sad-sounding melody. Before she could bite back the words, they had slipped out of her mouth, "Are you alright?"

[Cortney Smit]

Cortney nodded, as she would have done the same if she had been riding and come upon someone else ahead of them.

The girl quite liked the Hanover breed, and would possibly get one herself when she outgrew Olé, in skill rather than size, but that would be a while in the future yet, as she had no intention of asking her parents for another horse, not now anyway.

She bit her lip at the question that was asked and she wrapped her arms around her stomach, not a posture that was expected of the head cheerleader. She swallowed hard to push down the emotions that threatened to drown her, her eyes glanced toward the water again. "I lost my sister five years ago." She replied softly as she watched the flow of the water and shrugged, not quite feeling like sharing the fact that her sister had also been her twin, the other half of her whole. "This trail reminds me of a ride we used to do back home." Drenthe hadn't been her home in five years, but that's where she would always refer to as home, the place she had been complete, everything after that was just a place she hovered in.

[Katja Eder]

Katja bit the inside of her cheek as she saw the girl's posture. Sure, she might be oblivious sometimes, but it was relatively obvious that she had managed to hit a nerve, but there was no way to take it back now. She listened to Cortney's answer, at once knowing why the other girl had effectively blocked herself off at the question, "My sincerest sympathies for your loss." She couldn't even imagine losing Kai, as much as they argued sometimes, and Cortney had lost her twin. The one pair of twins she had known had always had a closer bond than mere siblings, and it had probably been similar there.

As Cortney spoke further, about the trail they were on, Katja nodded, looking out at the setting, "Your home must have been beautiful." She didn't know what else she could say to acknowledge the statement, but hoped that it would do. Deciding that she might leave Cortney be, since she had probably come out to be on her own. Glancing down at where she was still holding Mukki's reins, she took a breath, "I will leave you to your memories, then. I did not mean to intrude, and apologize for it."

[Cortney Smit]

Cortney shrugged off the girl's sympathy. "Thanks." She replied. She didn't want to dwell on the thought anymore, she had managed to convince her parents that she'd gotten over her sister's death, that it didn't still cut her apart like a knife every time she thought about the fact that she should have been in the back of that car as well, that she should still be with her sister!

She shook her head to clear it as she realised that the other girl was talking again. "It was." She replied. "I don't know much of Norway that wasn't. Even in the winter it was still beautiful." She nodded as Katja excused herself, she knew that she should tell the other girl that there was no need to apologise, but she couldn't think of how to say it, so she just remained silent, even if it did make her out to be a cow.

She waited until the horse had gone out of sight before she moved over so that she was walking along the very edge of the trail again, and she all but balanced along the edge as she walked. When they had left Norway and moved over to the States, her parents, and grandparents, had watched her like a hawk. She had joined the choir at the church her grandparents attended more to get away from their eagle eyes, plus she loved singing, and it gave her an excuse of something to do when one of the older people in the house suggested that she go and visit a local riding school, go for a hack with their friends' children, things like that when she wanted nothing to do with horses. She'd never say that she was overtly religious, but she did miss the small church where she had sung every Sunday and on all religious holidays. Part of her wished that the Academy had a chapel, but she was happy to come out to the trails, or sit in the memory garden when she needed to be close to Myriam.

She drew in a shaky breath as the tears began to fall.